You’d think that she would’ve learned by now. So many mistakes, similar every single time.
She sighed as she zipped her bag shut, trying to filter out the sound of his voice from the babble around her.
It had always been that way for her. The guy was always the wrong one.
There was that guy who was interested, until he met her best friend.
Then there was that guy who was her best friend.
There was that guy who simply wasn’t interested.
That guy who just wanted to be friends, but benefits were appreciated.
And there was that guy who just hadn’t thought of it, wasn’t ready, he had said.
And now there was him.
It had cost her bits off her and now there wasn’t much left, this time she was in way over her head. She smiled at her friends, all waiting for her, to be done packing her bag, done packing the bits of her complicated life away at the end of the day. She mentioned something funny that had happened during the day, and laughter sounded around her too. She smiled and then laughed, infected by good cheer. She looked at her friend, and then looked beyond. At him.
He was there, looking at her, with that look, that questioning look, she had come to recognize and cherish. He wasn’t perfect, far from it. But he was him, and that was all that mattered to her. Suddenly his gaze withdrew and his smile deepened, that dimple grew, as that girl walked towards him, and he waited. She groaned in her head, she knew she’d never be as perfect as her. Never, not even if she tried. Not that she wanted to, because she just wanted to be, herself.
She felt a hand on her shoulder and realized that her friends had seen her. Looking apologetic, she moved away, walking slowly towards the doorway, letting her friends guide her, enveloped in her happy cushion of comfort and joy.
And suddenly he was there, in front of her, looking at her, smiling, a glint in his eyes. She stopped and stood stock still, her friends were amazingly, missing. Gone. When she needed them to keep her sane, from blabbering.
She smiled. “See you tomorrow?” She blinked. Did she just actually say that? She groaned mentally again. Good going. He seemed unperturbed by display of absolute stupidity, and smiled. “You too.
She looked at her watch and looked away, unsure of what exactly to say that wouldn’t leave her looking stupid. God knows he’s laughed at her enough already. He grasped her elbow, gently turning her towards him, and she stiffened. “If you’re done staring into space, shall we go?” She smiled, and nodded, walking with him.
Till she figured it out for herself, this would do. This would do just fine, she thought. Then after a long time, she looked at him, and smiled, a real smile. And he smiled too, a real smile.
Friday, October 30, 2009
Smile.
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